death

So a really good friend of mine passed away recently as in last monday i think it was. He was only 17, and an amazing person he could always make you laugh and i miss his smile so much.. he made a dumb choice and in return it took his life.. i just want to say that i know there is a God and im at lost for the reason why you take such a good people from this world he was only 17!! he hadnt had a chance to live yet... even though that is all he did was "live my life to the fullest" his words and i just freakin miss him so much.. i cried so hard at the funeral and i didnt even reconigze the boy layin in that casket it didnt look like the kid i kissed this past snow storm or the friend i hung out with and he got his foot stuck in a fake bulls butt i miss him and i am mad at him for doing what he did and making the choices he did.. well i just had to leave a good tribut about this amazing person which doesnt even do him justice.. to how absolutly amazing he was goodbye mark i miss you and i .. love you.. R.I.P

blahh

so last friday my school had our homecoming and i was selected princess out of my class which even though i thought it was amazing, i was totally pointless to buy a $260.00 dollar dress to wear for an hour.. but i loved ever moment of it.. i'll post some pictures when i get them on here but for now the twin baby boys are keeping what free time i have busy. everything nowadays is so busy i bearly have time to breath it feels like.

no voice to speakk...

i've no voice to speak with juss a silent mummer in the wind the thoughts and dreams die on my lips and i see my heart fall as it slips.. i no longer know left from right nor do i know if i shall sleep tonight.. i'll lie awake and think of you until my visions are subdued by the silent dreams that haunt me.. when the rising sun awakens me i hear the same sad slow beat the beat of my heart as it echos me. slow and sad.... slow and sad.. when i stagger to the edge of the desk i feel the deep presure growing in my chest.. im sorry for what i've done. the saddnes in me has finally won.

school

Hey i know i havent blogged in a while i've been really busy in school with cheering and what not. I should have a new poem on with in the next few days if i can find some inspiration.. good luck to me!

writers bock

so i was getting on here to write another poem and i realized i have writers block :( i havent has inspriation lately or anything of the sort... it kinda sucks because i enjoy writing so much..

im lost..

so today i found out a boy i had like for a very long time is datin someone else, but the thing is he would never date me and we have been bestfriends forever... i dont know what is wrong with me that he would choose her over me... i juss dont know how to deal with things like that.. i wanted to cry but i cant cry because truthfully he juss drug me threw the dirt over and over again with him liking me only when i was dating someone.. it juss doesnt make sense i dont know if i will ever really be happy because someone said to me that im not going to be happy because i dont know what i want and it made me realize i dont know what i want i dont know what really even makes me happy.. am i broken? is there something wrong with me that makes me push everyone away once they start to get close to me? will i ever really be happy i juss dont know anymore.. any advise anyone?

shallow eyes

Shallow eyes
Covered by deep lies
He tells her his story
But in her heart there is still worry
She smiles and walks away
But she just cant believe its all ok
She doesnt believe his deep lies
She sees it in her shallow eyes

some more of my poetry keep checking and i will try to post everyday (: